I’ve been a monster today. I admit it. I behaved badly from the moment the housekeeper showed up with her husband to help her (which meant I didn’t have my usual grace period to pick up downstairs while she cleaned upstairs), to just now in the Jeep with Will as I ‘loudly explained’ to him why I wanted to drive us across town in a hurry rather than let him do so.
I can see the film of myself rolling in my head, and I know I should settle down and handle the day more gracefully. But the critic in my head (you know, the movie critic?) is saying of the plot, “Well, why don’t they just listen to her and let her do what she knows is best? Why does she have to argue and insist just to get the simplest things done her way?” To which the rival critic counters, “You know, that’s a good question, but I found myself wondering throughout the film why she didn’t just relax and let things go?” Pretty much 2 thumbs down on today’s flick. Let’s call it a wrap and hope for better tomorrow.
Do you ever see yourself as if in a movie and wonder why you are doing whatever you are doing? Or why someone else is doing what they’re doing, for that matter? Is this out-of-body experience an indication of something seriously wrong with me? C’mon people, let’s have some reassurance, please!
Tonight or early tomorrow, Will and I are headed to New Hampshire to buy fireworks for our get-together with the Careres– our friends in Belmont. How many sparklers should I get to entertain the 10 kids who will be there (Nico will have a friend)? These are just some of the questions that have been weighing on me so heavily during my day as a bad actor. I guess I feel out of control, so I’m working extra hard to get back on course.
Ugh. I’ve been preoccupied with myself and my to-do list again, haven’t I? Let’s just call this a really bad monster flick turned melodrama and move on. Perhaps tomorrow’s flick will cast me as an action hero?